My voice is hoarse from the cold I seem to be almost catching, and the oh too constant yelling at my kids. It’s been a hard week - listening to myself. My emotions raging, my pulse surging and harsh tones pouring from my lips before I have time to stop them. A mess thrown upon my kids. I hear my inner voice question me, “what are they doing, that you must yell?” So I say sorry to my kids and I withdraw into the quiet to try to let love wash over my pulsing veins. “Get it together”, I tell myself. It helps, but only for a while, and overwhelm takes over again. It’s been a whole week of this and I find I don’t like myself much. Each day, one yelling episode after another.
How I am I supposed to give that raging mom inside grace?
But I must.
So I say sorry to my kids AGAIN. They forgive me, AGAIN, so I know I haven’t made a mess completely. I’ve taught them to be gracious, and loving, so I let them teach me in that moment to also be gracious and loving to their mother. I tell her “I’m sorry for being so hard on you”, and “I’m sorry for not taking better care of you”. I forgive her, and I tell her, “you’re doing your best”.
So today, love the mother of your children.
Extend grace to her. Don’t utter harsh words about all the ways she’s coming up short. Tell her she matters. Give her permission to rest. Love her. Your children need you to love her. Tell her she’s doing an amazing job. Forgive her when she makes a mess of things.
Motherhood is hard. It is one day after another of giving all of yourself until you are completely empty. Remember how much the mother of your children gives and has given. Honour her, speak life over her. And when her body, and soul and mind is tired - give her rest. Choose love. Choose the state of slowness. She deserves it, and her children need you to love her.